Coincidence? I think not [Humor/Crack: Blind Date - fürs Team]

[rolly-chan.livejournal.com]

Titel: Coincidence? I think not
Team: Sonne
Challenge: Humor/Crack: Blind Date [fürs Team]
Fandom: Kuroko no Basuke
Charaktere: Aomine/Kise
Wörter: 2104
Sprache: Englisch
Warnungen: keine (wobei, es ist aus Aomine's PoV, das könnte allein schon als Warnung gelten - er flucht btw sehr viel)
Inhalt: How likely is it that those blind date websites pick the same date for you twice?
Anmerkungen: ja, ich habe sehr wahrscheinlich überzogen, was die Zeit angeht. Ich kann leider nicht sagen, wie viel, da ich immer mal zwischendurch dran gearbeitet habe. Es hat aber echt Spaß gemacht, von daher würde ich es nicht ausschließen, dass ich nicht sehr viel überzogen habe (ich weiß noch aus Write or Die Zeiten, dass ich 1k Wörter pro 20 Minuten raushauen kann, wenns gut läuft, aber wie gesagt, ich weiß es leider nicht, sorry!)
Außerdem: Ich kann Aomine nicht ernst nehmen, I'm so sorry! :'D

---

Daiki already knows it's going to be an awful day. It's six in the morning.

Six.

In the morning.

The asscrack of dawn.

And he's awake.

If there is one thing Daiki doesn't want to be, it's awake.

He groans loudly to make it very clear to the world that he's mighty pissed, and reaches out blindly for his phone on the nightstand.

Normally, he'd just ignore it, but this time, he wants to know who it was that had the nerve to message him this fucking early. So he can pointedly ignore them instead of ignoring them in general.

When he finally gets his phone in his hand and wakes it up from its own slumber, he needs a few moments to adjust to the light before unlocking it.

It's a mail. Not even an instant message, but a fucking mail. Probably spam too. When he opens it, he groans again.

It's worse. It's that damn blind date site Satsuki insisted on registering Daiki on, because, and he quotes, "you won't find anyone interested in your grumpy face otherwise."

He groans once again when he sees that the blind date is today, of all days. He throws the phone down on the carpet and is ready to die.

Fortunately, he manages to go back to sleep so as to have a couple more hours of blissful ignorance. Unfortunately, his phone ringing wakes him up again. At fucking nine-twenty.

He swears to fuck he'll obliterate all his contacts if that's what it takes to have his sleep uninterrupted.

He actually has to get up to retrieve the damn phone, too, picking up as he throws himself down on the mattress with another groan. Because it's Satsuki, and she'll just annoy the hell out of him if he doesn't pick up. She'll always find a way.

"Dai-chan, I've seen you have a date today!" she tells him instead of greeting him like a normal fucking person. Daiki really wants the ground to swallow him now.

"Yes, hello to you too, Satsuki." He doesn't even question her having read his mail, apparently. He figures she just configured it to forward the mail to her address as well. Or maybe she just knows his password. Again. For some reason, she always does. Daiki called her a witch for it once. Needless to say, she wasn't impressed, and he had to endure her annoyance for a whole day. He doesn't want a repeat performance.

"Since you don't know how to get ready for dates-"

"I'm not dumb, Satsuki, I do-"

"I decided to help you out because I'm a good friend."

Daiki rolls his eyes and grumbles incoherently. He'll never be able to stop her, he knows that. Once Satsuki has her mind set on some goal, she unrelentingly marches towards it, and she makes anybody and anything yield. Apparently, finding Daiki a boy- or girlfriend is her goal now.

"I'll come over after lunch, so be ready!"

"The date is not until five, Satsuki, you don't-"

"You can never be prepared too early, Dai-chan! See you later!" And she just hangs up, having put in the last word on the matter. Daiki growls lowly but lets his hand fall on the pillow and tries to relax. He won't have much time for relaxing left.

Daiki feels like an idiot. He can hear Bakagami's voice inside his head yelling "Ahomine!" at him, that's how much he feels like an idiot, all just because Satsuki actually did go through his whole fucking wardrobe and even tried to do his hair, which, for the record, doesn't need making because it's short. Daiki has better things to do than do his hair. Sleep, for example.

But not only that, now he's also getting really pissed as well. His supposed blind date dude is late. Very late. Like, an hour late. Daiki really doesn't need to feel even more like an idiot standing by the stupid fountain for a whole hour. He did tell Satsuki that this is stupid, but does she ever listen to him? No, of course not. This train-wreck of a day could have been prevented if she had listened. People should listen to him more in general, because more often than not, he's right.

"Aominecchi!"

He turns and sees a very out of breath Kise. Who, Daiki admits, is a better view than his stupid blind date.

"What a surprise! What are you doing here?"

"Waiting for a stupid person who's late," he replies. There's no need for Kise to know it's supposed to be a blind date. It's all Satsuki's fault anyway.

Kise laughs nervously. "Well, I'm late, too." Then his eyes widen comically. "Wait- don't tell me- are you waiting for your blind date?"

For a moment, Daiki can't do anything but blink at Kise. "How do you… Did Satsuki tell you?"

"What?" Kise looks confused, but then just seems to ignore it. "You just said the person you're waiting for is late, and I'm…" he looks at his watch, "an hour late, wow."

"You're not serious." Daiki crosses his arms in front of his chest. "This is an elaborate joke, right?" He looks around in case he can spot his stupid friends watching them and laughing their asses off. He can't see any of them, though.

"It's not a joke. At least, I don't think it is? Must be a coincidence…" Kise shrugs, like it's no big deal, and Daiki thinks maybe he's lucky after all and it will all blow over, but then Kise smirks at him. "Sooo, you're looking for blind dates?"

Daiki glares at him. "Wipe that stupid grin off, it's all Satsuki's fault. She forced me."

"No way!" Kise is laughing. Just, full-on laughing, as if it's the funniest thing he's heard all week, the fucker. Daiki really hates all his friends.

"And you're still here! I'd have imagined you'd have left, like, 45 minutes ago!" Kise wipes tears of laughter off his face and Daiki notices a black smudge under his eye. However, because he's irritated and feels petty, he decides not to tell Kise and see how he likes that, walking around with a smudge on his pretty face.

"I would have, if Satsuki weren't back home just waiting for me to return early so she can chew my ear off. No thanks."

Kise chuckles, but thankfully, doesn't erupt into laughter again. "My photo shooting took longer than planned, which is why I'm late, by the way."

"Who cares. Since you're here already, let's go, I need a new shirt for playing."

"You're very single-minded, you know that?" Kise says, but he's still laughing, so Daiki ignores it.

"You can come with me or stay here and be bored, your choice."

"No need to be so mean on our date, Aominecchi!"

"Shut up."

He follows Daiki to the station anyway and they ride the train together to their new destination.

Daiki admits that all in all, this could have gone so much worse. Kise's more fun to be with than some stupid random guy from a stupid random website. He'll never say this out loud, though, Kise really doesn't need any more ego-boosts.

It's already dark when Daiki returns home, and Satsuki is, thankfully, not there anymore. He wouldn't have put that past her, though.

However, as he goes through his evening routine, brushing his teeth and washing up, he can't shake the feeling that he's missing something. Something important. Not unlike when he missed being bisexual, because it simply was never an issue. Until he saw one of Satsuki's manga, in which two guys were kissing, and Daiki thought huh, looks fun. When Satsuki asked, he told her he doesn't like complications, so he won't make one out of this. It's the modern world, after all. They're not stuck in ancient times. He can deal, especially since he's simply not a guy for crises. So he decides to simply not have an unnecessary crisis over this.

Maybe it has to do with how much fun it has been trying on new shirts and then looking at basketball shoes with Kise. Maybe what he's missing is that he simply needs to find someone he can have fun with, and the rest will align itself. Someone like Kise.

Daiki shrugs to no one, and goes to bed. No need to be thinking about such matters when he can sleep. He's sure that in the morning, it'll all make more sense.

The next morning he's all but forgotten about it, and for a week, he doesn't spend another second thinking about it until Satsuki forces him on a blind date again. Daiki didn't insist on a different site, in the hopes of maybe the universe aligning again and giving him the same match so he can spend another day in peace, but Satsuki seemed to think it'd had a bad impact on him (which it didn't have, but Daiki really has no desire to argue about it), and so registered him on yet another blind date site. Only a day later, he was already matched up with someone.

"What the hell are you doing here again?" Daiki can't believe it. Kise is waiting at the bench next to the entrance to the park, exactly where Daiki is supposed to meet his blind date. This can't be a coincidence this time. Kise probably lied and this is, after all, an elaborate plan to drive Daiki up the wall.

Kise's face contorts in a funny way. "What? Why are you here?"

"Don't play dumb, idiot, this can't be a coincidence. You're in cahoots with the others, aren't you?" Daiki turns his head and looks around again, but he can't spot any of his friends, like last time. They must have hid well.

"In cahoots? What?" Kise seems genuinely confused, with furrowed brows and a questioning look on his face. Daiki doesn't know what to think of this.

"How likely is it that we both register at the same new website and it matches us again? Do you think I'm stupid?"

"Register at the same… wait, you're here on a blind date?!" Now, Kise looks angry as well, but Daiki wants none of it.

"Like you didn't know!"

"Of course I didn't!"

"Liar!"

"Am not! But I know who is!"

"That's not- wait, what?" Trust Kise to totally throw Daiki off.

Kise huffs. "Yeah, I know who set this up." He looks Daiki in the eyes, eyes still narrowed. "Momocchi."

"She wouldn't," Daiki says, even though at the same time, he realizes that she totally would. He groans. "Seriously?!"

Kise huffs again. "Yeah."

Daiki pulls out his phone to chew her out immediately, but then freezes when suddenly, a realization comes to the forefront of his mind. It unfolds slowly, like a fucking flower, or present wrapped a dozen times because his friends are evil.

The realization that this is maybe not the worst result. That this is Kise, someone Daiki can have a lot of fun with, who loves basketball almost as much as he does, and who isn't someone he has to get to know and impress to keep him, because he already knows all about him and doesn't care about any of his bad sides (well, Daiki guesses he tolerates them, like Daiki tolerates Kise's dumb sides).

"What?" Kise blinks at him, confused.

"You know what. Maybe she's got a point." He looks straight at Kise, and for a moment, there is a heavy silence.

"You mean that?" Kise looks wary, like he's not quite sure Daiki is serious.

"Why the hell not? You're my friend and I like you. Why not see where this goes?"

Kise dramatically throws his hand at his heart. "You like me!" But then he goes more serious again. "But to be honest, same. You're a much better match than all the others I had before."

"Of course I am, I'm me."

Kise actually laughs at that, then walks past him, bumping Daiki's shoulder on the way. "C'mon, let's go on a date, then."

"We're not telling Satsuki, though. Let her struggle."

"Dude, I'm not risking her wrath. The moment she asks me, I spill."

"Point. I'm not paying for you, though, on the date."

Kise laughs again. "Wouldn't expect you to!"

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

As they bicker on their way, Daiki thinks that for once, he's made the right choice, and refuses to think about how it was all Satsuki's diabolical plan all along. He should have known. But then again, all's well that ends well.