The fork (In jedem Universum - Romantik/Intimität - für mich)

[leviathans-moon.livejournal.com]

Titel:The fork
Team: Rapunzel
Challenge: In jedem Universum - Romantik/Intimität-Tabelle (für mich)
Wörter: 360
Kommentar: Es musste schnell gehen, und könnte vielleicht sogar ausgebaut werden, also nicht zu viel erwarten. Auf English.



And there it was, the little difference. You hold your fork with your left hand, not your right one.
It's been eight days since the change. My hopes that things would be normal were rising, slowly rising. I never would have expected to find you again, I thought I had lost you. And there you were and everything seemed as it did, as it always did. There is a happiness that cannot be explained except by those who have lost, and are longing to regain. I had found you, and my hopes that this would be okay, good, fantastic even were building up. Now they are falling harder than they would have three days ago, or even yesterday. I thought it would be the way you kiss me, the way you hug me, the way you fuck me. But it all felt so familiar, so amazing, so beautiful that the hopes accumulating in my head built a ladder that went up and up and up, hitting the stars and the darkness beyond. It felt possible.
But it is the way you are holding your fork, and I didn't notice at first. Maybe you didn't do it at first, but now there it is. Fork in the left hand, for the third meal today. The fork has created a chasm between us, a wide ripple in the fabric of ourselves, slowly chipping away at your familiarity. I can feel the smell disappearing, an unknown sourness reaching my nose when you stand near me. A part of me misses you already; I can feel the loneliness creeping into my cells, into my being, into my heart.
You say something and I barely register it, but it sounds wrong and I can feel the thought of you slipping away and the wish for the time before the change replacing it. We need to go back, I need to go back.
I want you again. I want the fork in your right hand, I want your voice saying the right things, I want your smell causing the right things in me. I need to go back. I will go back and find you again.